During my time in high school, I struggled with lack of self-confidence. I found myself constantly comparing myself to others, and when things didn’t go well, I often blamed myself for it.

This was when I started suffering with self-criticism and developed negative beliefs such as:

 “I don’t deserve this”.

“I am a failure”.

“He/She is better than me”.

These beliefs were constantly echoing in my mind, as if someone kept whispering them to me. All of these inner voices gradually filtered into negative feelings which were ingrained in my subconscious mind and it began to affect my thoughts and behaviors without my awareness.

As my subconscious was being constantly fed on negative feelings, it was programmed into seeing everything as negative.

I hope that you find great value in the lessons i have learned from life and generously share with you. Incorporating small habits can have a very big impact in our life and by incorporating them into our daily routine, we can notice positive changes in our productivity, focus, mood, personal well-being and thus, we are able to manage our emotions better and create meaningful relationships with others.

1-Don’t Ignore Your Negative Feelings

If you are capable of reflecting on your negative feelings, you will be able to handle negative issues more effectively in the future. Don’t be afraid of facing your negative emotions, as those emotions are part of you, they wish to be heard and recognised as well.

It’s crucial to confront and understand the reasons behind all your negative emotions.

2- Be Open Minded

Most people make bad decisions due to them being certain that they are right or regard opposing views as a threat to their independent thinking and decision making ability.

Be open to receiving opposing views or different perspectives when making decisions or communicating with others. Look at things more objectively instead of feeling attacked.

3- Victim Mindset

I used to have a victim mindset where I tend to blame everything else except for myself and I realised that’s not going to solve my problem, it felt more like I was just running away from the issue. This approach can be harmful to emotional intelligence.

You can shift away from a victim mindset by identifying and accepting the victim mindset that exists within you.

Take responsibility for your emotions, reactions, and life experiences. Understand that you have the power to choose how you respond to challenges and setbacks, rather than being a passive victim of circumstances.

4- Stop Comparing Yourself With Others

Learn to understand that everyone comes from different backgrounds/circumstances and no one is perfect. Embracing this understanding allows us to redirect our efforts toward self-improvement and self-compassion.

Constant comparison frequently results in emotions of inadequacy, self-doubt, and diminished sense of self-worth.

As long as you focus on your personal goals or anything that you want to achieve in life, life will give you what you want if you just keep on working towards it.

When you stop comparing yourself to others, you free yourself from the pressures of unrealistic standards.

5- Stop Self-Criticism

Have you been hearing that inner voice of yours throwing harsh words at you? One way that I’ve learned how to handle this is to acknowledge it.

When self-criticism hits, instead of ignoring it, respond to it in this manner: “Yes I’ve heard you, but mistakes have been made and I just have to learn from it and move on.”

6- Don’t be Too Hard On Yourself

Sometimes life can throw unexpected obstacles at you and you might experience emotional outbreaks. Tell yourself that it’s okay that things happened sometimes and it is usually out of your control.

Recognize that everyone makes mistakes and experiences failures, and that these moments do not define your worth or competence.

Practice self-acceptance by embracing your imperfections and embracing the learning opportunities they present.

7- Transforming Overwhelming Emotions To Motivation.

It takes a change in perspective and deliberate measures to turn overwhelming feelings into motivations. By reframing the way you perceive and respond to your emotions, you can harness their power to propel yourself forward. For instance, when faced with fear, you can reframe it as a sign of progress and utilize it as motivation to push yourself beyond of your comfort zones rather than allowing it to immobilize you. You can view fear as an opportunity for personal development and embrace it as a catalyst for taking risks. By adopting a proactive and empowering mindset towards emotions, you can transform even the most overwhelming ones into sources of motivation and valuable insights.

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